Thought Disorder

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Sticking my right hand into a metal can unsuspectingly, I immediately felt a sharp pain. I instinctively pulled my hand out and realised there was a deep cut on the 4th finger, and blood started to ooze out without restrain. Due to my ignorance of first aid, I merely applied tremendous pressure to the cut, and later attempted to run it under water. A piercing, sharp pain engulfed my finger. My dad then applied some Chinese ointment to it and pasted a plaster over it. I bet that the plaster gauze is now entirely covered with blood.

Barely two weeks ago I had a humongous bruise on my knee. It's almost gone now! I'm quite sad over the departure of the bruise actually.

Accident-prone, that's all.

-
I can't seem to remember how 2008 was. I didn't particularly enjoy 2008, and it wasn't as memorable as 2007 was. Perhaps I spent too much time cooping myself at home, and the intensive mugging has rendered me a little...delirious. Worrying about palpable nonsense all the time. The only lucid memory is probably the mugging? The days of having to drag myself through school, doing the same routine week after week. I think HK trip wasn't that great of a memory - it gets less fun as you get older because of responsibilities. Senior high life is not exactly exciting - it's more of an attempt to be 'fun'. Oh well, but we tried.

But still, in 2008 I got to make better friends and this should be the greatest gift of the year.

(GUESS WHO?)

I admit, the initial awkwardness of joining SH comm had dissipated. In fact, it has been an awesome experience. Being with the CO people makes me forget about real school life (yknow some things) Looking forward to more fun! (I hope)

And the last memory of 2008: SHIC 2008. Great great memory to end the whole year.

And in 2009: SYF, A Levels.

My sincere wish for 2009 is that I can finally leave this life for good when I enter university/adulthood. Oh and, Gold with Honours for SYF, and pwnz A Levels.

10:20 PM

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

SHIC 08 was a success!
(Despite the bad turnout rate)

I probably didn't enjoy it as much as the juniors did, because I practically participated in 0 activities, and had gone for the many dry-runs. After the 1st day's camp I had to even attend a family gathering, and so I reached home at midnight and slept close to 2am. On the 2nd day, I was utterly enervated. Unlike the juniors, I wasn't very 'high' during the finale night - all I wanted to do is to go home and sleep! Moreover, there was orientation dry-run (which turned out to be a total mess) the next day, bright and early in the morning. I left early for dry-run and went home to watch a bit of Kindaichi, falling asleep subsquently.

What a 2-day camp! Hell tiring! But everyone's group names were so funny! Like 小娘惹 and 还我鸡汤! (I added lots of bonus points for group names I like a lot! Super biased!) And I glad that the juniors enjoyed A Christmas Surprise which Suyun and I have planned tirelessly for the last couple of weeks. Was quite surprised to hear positive feedback actually. It's probably due to me knowing the storyline inside-out, so it may feel a little boring on my side. I'd a great time misleading the juniors though :D Hope our standards are on par with the upcoming orientation's event. But still, kudos to both Suyun and me! Kudos to Zhi Qian, Jia Hui and Shi Ning who lugged their barang barang to school (especially me but actually my dad gave me a lift that day)! Kudos to Kee Wei for rushing out the very interesting video within a few days! Kudos to Ting Pei and Biyu for overseeing and prompting our whole event! Kudos to all station masters who were so tired they fell asleep during the event!

Lastly, I hope everyone likes the tshirt which I've sat myself down to squeeze the design idea out. Oh well. Nice to hear people commending it though! *Big beam*

On another note, I think it's the aftermath of being too accustomed to be going to school for activities. I'm extremely languid. Just sleep, eat and watch Kindaichi. Omg I think the Kindaichi series is quite bloodcurdling. Wait, I should be doing something productive like studying or doing homework. Sigh. Till school reopens. I'll get into the mood soon. Omg, 2009 is coming! Go away 2009!

ps. I think it's the benign-looking cup of coke from last Saturday. We had a mass Macs meal and my meal comprised a cup of coke because I had assumed that I couldn't change it to Milo. Since then, I started developing itchy spots which won't disappear, and spread even more. Sweet things make me itchy, always! Scratch or not to scratch? Intractable problem.

11:45 PM

Friday, December 26, 2008

Some parts of me click with you, but some parts of me obviously don't.

You get on my nerves sometimes. (I can endure this)
But I won't forget this.

(You don't understand me because you're not me, you didn't grow up in my environment, and worst: you think that I'm living a life that is very similar to yours)

Unwanted words spill. I get annoyed...but all buried in my heart.

I should have been classified as an introvert because I think I'm gradually transforming into one.

12:15 AM

Thursday, December 25, 2008

It's Christmas! But actually I don't really celebrate it, except for gathering with my Christian relatives every year. I'm not even a Christian, so why should I celebrate it? Doesn't make sense to me. Still, I stayed up last night to finish the card for Yiwei, only to hear boisterous laughter and a loud 'Merry Christmas' when the clock struck 0000. I think if I mail the card today, it'll only get to her mailbox only on Monday. Tres sighs! I haven't sent a card in ages though! Hoho!

Anyway I've a monstrous bruise on my knee. I got it in a flurried attempt to jump down the auditorium stage last Saturday. I can safely crown it the biggest and most visible bruise I've ever had in my whole life for now. It has evolved into a big black patch, and it's awfully painful.

It looks darker in real life. Haven't got a visible bruise in my entire life because of my skin colour, I assume. What an achievement for me!!! :D (I secretly harbour a liking for the bruise)
-

We're just 2 days away from SHIC! I'm starting to get a little worried for the event I'm planning because up till now, several logistics matters have not been completely settled. And I hope we can finish up the leftover things before Saturday, and let Mr. Ng go through the dry-run...

But thinking about the upcoming camp makes me pretty gloomy too, because it'll be nearing the end of this year, signalling that 2009 is coming, A LEVELS ARE COMING!! I must say I've rested enough this whole holidays, and I'm going to enter intense study mode after orientation ends. Hopefully so. Thinking about this makes me so melancholic and inert. If I don't rest and do the things I want now, I won't get to next year! Truth is, I'm execrably scared.

12:13 PM

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Sneak Peek!

Initiation Camp 2008!
(Just the t-shirt design! HAHAHA!!!)

After two tumultuous days of searching for inspiration high and low plus doing a flop design which everyone raised eyebrows at, I finally settled myself down just now to complete the front design. Racked my brains thoroughly!!! I completed it in say, a few hours? The colours aren't filled yet because my failing computer refuses to install the scanner's software. Sigh, I'll photoshop tomorrow when I get the digital copy. As for the back design...pending! Full design to be released on, I think, this coming Friday? Here on this space! (If you're interested)

Anyway, these two days were filled with crazy shit, I swear. I'm left mortally enervated. Won't reveal much details here though because everything's still hush hush. Yesterday after practice, we filmed a bit and tape-recorded for the longest time ever! Addition of many flopped recordings and tons of uncontrolled laughter. Stayed until an inordinate 7+ pm to finish that few recordings - it was awfully maniacal. And today, we had to wake up at unearthly hours to drag ourselves to school (despite me being late) and do dry-run(s). Later we walked like crazy, like from school to National Stadium area to Kallang river area to Aljunied MRT?!?! Almost died along the way. Ate Rochor beancurd! But still, despite everyone being all exhausted and worn out at the end of each day, the two days were really fulfilling and were filled with loads of fun and laughter!! Love the CO people! <3

ARE YOU GAME? INITIATION CAMP 08!

11:45 PM

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Warning: Birdbrained post ahead

I was planning to attend The Little Nyonya roadshow when Yiwei notified me of such an event a few days back.

But now, I'm not going to!

BECAUSE. I HAVE. SH CAMP ON THAT DAY.

Why, oh why. I saw an advertisement on TV just now. I think they will be giving out posters and allowing people to obtain the cast's signatures!! Sigh. I won't be able to make it. (Unless I make my mom go in my place, which is highly impossible) I think there will be a horde of people on the day itself though. I'll hate squeezing with crowds!

But the point is, I can't even make my way there! ):

Oh well. Commitments reign my life.

I think the show is getting a bit boring though. It's probably due to me reading Iweekly's synopses. Just now, I went to read synopses for a few episodes which will be aired next week because I've a bird brain and my brain can't overcome tempations at all.

BTW, I'm done with SHIC's shirt design! Think it's a little dumb though. Have not done the outlining and touching up and mass erasing. Let's see what everyone thinks of it tomorrow. Oh and I'll be going to the new old campus tomorrow, technically today which is Saturday. Sorry for being both oxymoronic and moronic. Goodbye!

12:08 AM

Thursday, December 18, 2008

IDEAS

I NEED IDEAS!!! FOR THE DESIGNING OF SHIC (pronounced 'chic', mind you) SHIRT!!!

Deadline: Saturday
Ideas: None, but working along the lines of 'Sugar, Spice and Everything Nice'

Still no inspirations. Big fat sigh!

Ah I really have a lousy neck and a lousy shoulder. They are so stiff and painful! Always!

Am addicted to All For You by Namie Amuro!

10:53 PM

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Feverish

The monthly cramps have returned for revenge! ):

Today was like, the actual move. But most of us Y5s were stationed at the Mt. Sinai campus. I haven't been to the new campus at all, but I will, soon! Heard it's still an execrable mess there though, with dust flying everywhere and much of the place still undone. But anyway, I'd a great time working out in the early morning, moving many heavy instruments and whatnot. Many of them were late!! And I reckon we have too many unnecessary things, it's somewhat like my room. Rubbish aplenty! Things were moved quite quickly though. I think by 1pm or so we were more or less done? Planned IC for a while, then lunched and then decided to watch Twilight! Haven't read the novel yet so it wasn't exactly boring for me. (Shi Ning and Suyun were complaining of boredom what the hell!) But not too good, Iweekly rated it 2.5 stars only! The novel must be so much more interesting and detailed I assume. Reading it soon! So that was my fast great day, planning for IC tomorrow too. Hope everything goes well! So much clutter to settle oh gosh. My puny brain is going to explode.

Zero time to do anything! Let alone to watch videos/read books. Fantastic. Or probably, I should stop wasting time on the computer. ):

I haven't been sick for the whole year, not even flu. Miraculous flu jab + loads of water after expiration! But now, I'm starting to feel slightly feverish.

11:34 PM

Awsm!

Yay I found an Elmo Jibbit for my crocs :D And FT got me Kindaichi Seasons 1, 2 and 3 which are extremely hard to locate online and even quite impossible to buy them in stores. Happy!

But on the other hand...

Fatuous little actions: I've returned to my habit of buying Iweekly every week. But now I'm preventing myself from reading the synopses of Little Nyonya which are located at the back of Iweekly. Usually, I'd love spoilers like I'll read spoilers on blogs/forums from head to toe but uh after reading the spoilers for LN I thought the show was pretty boring because I could predict what was going to happen. And that sucks. ); I've also this sudden urge to rewatch some dramas but there are fetters that perturb me. After returning from KL, I seem to be existing in another world, clean forgetting that I've a lot of homework to do, lunwen to complete (BIG FAAAT SIGH!), SATs to study for (SRSLY why did I even bother to want to take it?) etc. When I looked at the calendar today I realised more than half the holidays are gone and the other half are swarmed by activities. What was I doing back then?

Brr.

12:00 AM

Thursday, December 11, 2008

OMG IF NOT FOR GARY, I WILL MISS ONE EPISODE OF THE LITTLE NYONYA TOMORROW. LOBANG KING IS ULTIMATELY THE BEST (I KID!)

XIEXIENI!

11:52 PM

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

10:31 PM

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Sardine curry poks FTW but I still insist that I hate sardines maxxxxx.

How moronic?

11:43 PM

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Inactivity

I have evolved into a sloth! My mind has degraded and disintegrated because I can't bring myself to do tasks that require thinking, such as mugging and reading. After meals I'll flop onto the bed and snooze, or I'll flock to the computer to do mostly unproductive things. It's queer that after so many many months of brain workouts in school, our brains will still become 'rusty' after weeks of habitual inactivity. And such mental indolence has made my brain all feeble. When I pick up shreds of work to attempt to do every now and then, there is this inescapable mental blockage and my head will hurt like crazy. Ahh.

Plus, my eyesight has probably become worse.
> : (

Well, the remnants of 2008 can be summarised into a few words: a few days. Can you believe how quickly time passes? It felt like yesterday that I was attending the first few lectures of J1, getting myself familiarised with the academic demands of Senior High, mugging for CTs within a week and subsequently taking it, going to HK with CO, taking promos and then PW assessment. How did I survive? No idea. I probably told myself to survive each week, and I probably took Saturday the goal of my life back then. It was crazy. It was hellish.

Now, 6CXX here I come! Not that I'm looking forward to it. Not that I'm prepared for it. It's just something that I know that I can't avoid. Yeah and I've been busy convincing myself that I'm taking A levels next year and that it won't be as scary as I've been imagining. (LIKE REAL) I presume when As really start, it will be over really soon, and 12 years of education will culminate. It's really supersonic.

Approximately 5 weeks of holidays left till I truly become a J2 to face one of my biggest fears!

10:50 PM

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Long, Long Way Ahead

12:27 AM

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

> : (

11:02 PM

About

Felicia studied in Dunman High School, loves elmo, is a major drama addict and is a cake lover. She has quit coffee even though she loves it.